How Gay Souls Get Reincarnated
There is a notion in Tibetan Buddhism that hints at the spiritual identity of gay people. After death, souls wait in the bardo for another incarnation. In this disembodied state, they float around, waiting for something to happen, looking for something to interest them. Frequently they become sexually attracted to the sight of human couples in sexual intercourse. (If you could be invisibly present anywhere, wouldn't you go looking for sex?)
If a particular soul happens to be too close, too attentive and too personally involved when a sperm and ovum unite, that soul will be pulled into incarnation as the offspring of that sexual union. That is how souls get reincarnated.
A homosexual soul, however, floating in the bardo state, can watch lots of acts of homosexual intercourse without ever being drawn into incarnation. In fact, it seems like it would never get pulled into incarnation at all. Thus homosexual souls must come back only because they choose to. Perhaps they become bored in the bardo and shift their consciousness from lust to compassion for the suffering they observe. We might even say gay people come into the world as bodhisattvas.
Joy In The Joy Of Others
From the Bodhisattva story, Buddhists derives the four abodes of consciousness, also called the Four Immeasurables. These are the proper attitudes to hold toward life: compassion, loving-kindness, joy in the joy of others, and equanimity.
Joy in the joy of others is the spiritual basis for sexual liberation. Instead of judging other people's sexual pleasures and, wittingly or unwittingly, intending evil on them out of resentment and disapproval, we can be glad for them and wish them well.
As all people begin to wish well instead of ill, the self-fulfilling prophecies of bad things happening will diminish. That is how we save all those sentient beings. If we are compassionate and conscientious about the consequences of our actions, then we do not cause harm to others. If we treat people with loving-kindness, we make the world a kinder place. If we truly experience joy in the joy of others, we release resentment and disapproval and enter into joy ourself. If we experience all things with equanimity, we overcome fear and desire, we let go of judgment and resistance to life and we create a context for ourself in which to say yes to experience.
A mantra associated with the bodhisattva goes: "May all beings be happy. May all beings be free." What a good attitude to have all the time!
If you want to find a reason for joy, just be joyful that other people are happy. Be joyful that there are beautiful men in the world. The way to find joy and happiness is to rise above your own situation. You'll never find joy if you have to get everything you can imagine wanting--unless what you want is others' being happy. Then you can get what you want every time.
When you're standing in a gay bar, hoping somebody will talk to you, be happy for all the people who are talking to one another. Wish them all well. Wish them all love. You might not meet anybody yourself that night. But you won't go home frustrated. You can go home knowing that some of those men did meet one another and, even now, are experiencing the joys you wished for them.
From Gay Spirituality: The Role of Gay Identity in the Transformation of Human Consciousness, Alyson 2000, Lambda Literary Award winner.
