Table of Contents
Also on this website:
SPIRITUALITY: The Role of
Gay Identity in the Transformation of Human Consciousness
Things Our Homosexuality Tells Us about the Nature
of God and the Universe
MATTER: updated, revised & expanded edition from Lethe Press
with Afterword by Mark Jordan
LIFE IN PERSPECTIVE: A romance novel set in the 1980s and the 1890s.
THE FOURTH QUILL, a
novel about attitudinal healing and the problem of evil
TWO SPIRITS: A Story of Life with the
Navajo, a collaboration with Walter L. Williams
CHARMED LIVES: Spinning Straw into
Gold: Reclaiming Our Queer Spirituality Through Story
A NOVEL ABOUT HEALING.
Books on Gay Spirituality:
Crane Gay Spirituality Series
Toby's review of Samuel Avery's The
Dimensional Structure of
Coincidence: "Aliens Settle in San
Simple Answer to the Gay Marriage Debate
Why gay people should NOT Marry
Wedding Cake Liberation
Gay Marriage in Texas
Shame on the American People
The "highest form of love"
Second March on
Bifurcation of Gay Spirituality
cause of homosexuality
origins of homophobia
about Jungian ideas in gay consciousness
What is homosexuality?
is Gay Spirituality?
What Jesus said about Gay
Common Experiences Unique to Gay
Is there a "uniquely gay
The purpose of homosexuality
The Reincarnation of Edward
The Gay Succession
Interview on the Nature of
What the Bible Says about
Mesosexual Ideal for Straight Men
of Gay Spirituality
of Gay Liberation Activity
Why Gay Spirituality: Spirituality
as Artistic Medium
Easton Mountain Retreat Center
Andrew Harvey &
Spirituality Summit in May 2004 and
the "Statement of Spirituality"
"It's Always About You"
The myth of the
Joseph Campbell's description of
Avalokiteshvara at the Baths.
Not A Wave
What is Enlightenment?
What is reincarnation?
How many lifetimes in an ego?
Emptiness & Religious Ideas
Experiencing experiencing experiencing
Going into the Light
Meditations for a Funeral
The way to get to heaven
Buddha's father was right
Advice to Travelers to India
The Danda Nata
& goddess Kalika
Nate Berkus is a bodhisattva
John Boswell was Immanuel Kant
The Two Loves
Toby Johnson Believes
The Joseph Campbell Connection
Campbell & The Pre/Trans Fallacy
The Nature of Religion
What's true about
Gay is a Blessing
Drawing Long Straws
Gay Spiritual Functions
The subtle workings of the spirit in gay men's lives.
The Sinfulness of
for a study of gay nondualism
"The Evolution of Gay Identity"
"St. John of the
Dark Night of the Soul."
Let Me Tell You a Secret
Religious Articulations of the
The Collective Unconscious
Driving as Spiritual Practice
Step in Evolution
The Moulting of the Holy Ghost
is a Bodhisattva
The Hero's Journey as archetype
Immaculate Conception & Assumption
Prostitution and the Nature of Evil
Hu: "God is present here"
The Life is in the Blood
retirement and the "freelance monastery"
Seeing with Different Eyes
experience at the Servites' Castle in Riverside
Great Dance according to C.S.Lewis
The Techniques Of The World Saviors
Part 1: Brer Rabbit and the
Part 2: The
Part 3: Jesus
and the Resurrection
Part 4: A
Course in Miracles
Secret of the Clear Light
Understanding the Clear Light
Souls Get Reincarnated
In honor of Sir Arthur C Clarke
Karellen was a homosexual
About Alien Abduction
are you looking for in a gay science fiction novel?
about Gay Mental Health
Ideas for gay
Kip and Toby,
and nicknamesake Toby Marotta.
Harry Hay, Founder of the gay movement
About Hay and The New Myth
About Karl Heinrich Ulrichs, the first
man to really "come out"
Michael Talbot, gay mystic
About Fr. Bernard Lynch
About Richard Baltzell
About Guy Mannheimer
About David Weyrauch
About Dennis Paddie
About Ask the Fire
About Arthur Evans
About Christopher Larkin
About Sterling Houston
About Michael Stevens
Our friend Tom Nash
Be Done on Earth
by Howard E. Cook
Pay Me What I'm Worth by
The Way Out by Christopher
The Gay Disciple by John Henson
Art That Dares by Kittredge Cherry
Coming Out, Coming Home by Kennth
the Light by B. Alan Bourgeois
Over Coffee: A conversation For Gay
Partnership & Conservative Faith by D.a. Thompson
Dark Knowledge by
Janet Planet by Eleanor
Kairos by Paul E. Hartman
with Jesus by D.K.Maylor
Kali Rising by Rudolph
Missing Myth by Gilles Herrada
Secret of the Second Coming by Howard E. Cook
The Scar Letters: A Novel
by Richard Alther
Future is Queer by Labonte & Schimel
by Charlene Spretnak
Spirituality 101 by Joe Perez
Cut Hand: A
Nineteeth Century Love Story on the American Frontier by Mark Wildyr
by Eleanor Lerman
Rizzoli by Felice Picano
to Unlocking the Closet Door by Chelsea Griffo
The Door of the
Heart by Diana Finfrock Farrar
by David Duncan
and Demion by Mel White
Gay Men and The New Way Forward by Raymond L.
Dimensional Stucture of Consciousness by Samuel Avery
Manly Pursuit of Desire and Love by Perry Brass
I'd like to suggest a new term: "mesosexual,"
meaning "in the middle."
That is, in the middle of the continuum between heterosexual and
I'm sure this idea applies to women as well as men, but let me stick to
discussing it as a male phenomenon (like the "metrosexual" phenomenon).
Most men are going to be heterosexual; they're going to fall in love
with women, desire sex with women, understand sexuality to be about
reproduction, look forward to fatherhood, and consider the male virtues
of strength and productiveness, ambition and success as important
But being heterosexual doesn't have to mean rejecting all that is even
vaguely related to homosexuality.
A straight man who is comfortable with his sexuality doesn't have to
defend his heterosexuality by opposing homosexuality or the gay virtues
of sensitivity, gentleness, love of beauty, and noncompetitiveness.
Indeed, a straight man comfortable with being straight ought to be able
to embrace his gay friend if the friend is sad and needs a hug; indeed,
he ought to be able to enjoy a little sexplay with his gay friend,
understanding this isn't about "love and attraction to females" as
about the playfulness of being embodied and interest in what other
human beings find important.
Such a straight man might be called "mesosexual."
I think that's a good goal for masculinity in modern urbanized society.
All men should be interested in their appearance, motivated to keep
their bodies in shape, educated in what kind of clothes to wear, how to
cook for themselves, and how to keep their surroundings attractive and
pleasing. All men should be tender and sensitive and compassionate. All
men should be happy for other people--other men--who follow their bliss
and discover their deepest feelings, even when those feelings are
The "metrosexual" term is a little too close to the silliness and hype
of the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy TV show and too focused on big
city living, and maybe too limited to style and appearance (based
mainly in size of expenditure of money).
But the idea is a good one.
There is absolutely no reason why homosexuality and heterosexuality
should seem at odds, any more than chocolate and vanilla are at odds
with each other.
I think the general "gayification of culture" has had the very positive
effect of making it ok for straight men to relax and allow their
so-called feminine side to exist along with their masculine side.
Making gay men "heroes" of the culture as style setters and arbiters of
taste changes the role models for all men, making sensitivity and
tenderness in men acceptable virtues--as they should be.
As we enter the truly modern -- and post modern and post post-modern --
world, it's time we get over belligerence and violence and injurious
AND making sex playful--rather than always so seriously involved with
reproduction--helps mental health and offers adventure. This is an
important contribution of gay culture: that sex need not be so serious.
Regarding Joseph Campbell, I don't think any of these terms
particularly apply because he lived, flourishied, and died before any
of these terms had any meaning. BUT he was certainly a man of culture
and dignity and kindness and compassion. Those really were old time
The "macho man" and the warrior and fierce competitor get attention in
the movies, but those have never really been proper roles in polite
Certainly one of the real contributions of the gay rights
struggle is to demonstrate that human beings can live full lives
without having children. AND maybe also to help "regular guys" be less
uptight about affection and feelings.
Let me share this positive comment I received about this posting
from a straight--mesosexual?--man
finished reading your post about metrosexuality and I must say it hits
the nail on the head.
heterosexual, I have several homosexual friends around whom
I feel totally comfortable.
we (men) need to drop some of our defenses and just enjoy each other as
people without all the hang ups about how our actions are perceived.
ridiculous is this? My brother in law (heterosexual--our wives
are biological sisters) just started feeling comfortable recently
hugging me after almost 20 years of knowing each other. Hey maybe
some day we'll actually give each other a kiss!
blessed in that I have many heterosexual friends who do not faint at
being intimate with me. Let me share one. I have a friend,
Scott, who is happily married with two children and is completely
"straight" sexually. Recently my wife and I spent an evening at
his home, dinner, conversation, an adult's night out if you will.
We were saying out good night's. Scott and I did the man thing,
shaking hands. Then we gave each other an intimate hug (which
we've done before), following by a passionate but not sexual kiss on
the lips. My first thought was, "Oh my God, we are doing this in
front of our wives. What must they be thinking?" My wife
said nothing about it, so I felt safe.
next time the four of us got together, I was alone with Scott's wife,
helping with serving some refreshments. Her comment to me was "I
wish you and Scott would feel free to display your love
(friendship) for each other more often. I know how deeply
you care for each other.." I almost dropped after hearing her
remark, but it made a lot of sense.